After weeks of combing through Chicago Craigslist and seeing that in order to get a personal bailout, I would have to do the unthinkable.
Massages, spanking and slapping for hire have been some of the offers out there.
What has brought me here, is the bleak reality of my financial situation and what is really going to happen to me in the next few months.
The uncertainity has left me with no options, except to write. Since prostitution clearly isn't an option.
I owe one thousand dollars in parking tickets, rent is due and and my car note is past due.
I also am on step one of a two step root canal. I don't have the $175 for it.
I have two payday loans out and my car note company has just high jacked my bank account, overdrafting it.
I luckily just found part time work for the weekend, convincing people to sign up for vacation time-shares and entering to win a car.
Last week it was starbucks cocoa samples at the zoo.
It just seems like my consistent valiant efforts to pay my bills isn't working.
There is no cents in the city.
There's none in my head and in my pocketbook.
And did I mention I have a full time job as a reporter? Aren't we supposed to be rich? And skinny? I am neither.
Today, the futile attempt from my car note company to debit $500 from my account, is making me think...it's all crashing down.
I have to do like all others, move back in with Mom, hide the car from the boot man, continue stealing toilet paper when possible.
Is there a higher paying job out there? Or is there really No Cents in the City?
Krys
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There are no cents and I can’t find anyone with sense!
ReplyDeleteAs I woke this morning, I couldn’t bare the thought of my routine. These uncalled for crazy times have beaten me down to a person of no interest. I see no light at the end of the tunnel and I see no option but continue on this path of destruction. My train has derailed and the tracks are unfixable at this time… What do I do?
I walked into the office trying to hold up a smile but wanting so bad to go back in my hole. I begin to talk to my coworker who clearly thinks she knows me due to a couple of conversations we had, the fact that she is telling me I eat a lot because I am hiding something or don’t want to face reality ( pretty much) is fucking uncalled for! So what if I like to eat pasta at midnight, does that make me stressed or with problems? Please, the one thing I hate most is when individuals stamp you with their experiences and tell you “who u are” because they think they know it all. Doesn’t she understand I am Indian, and we eat!
I had a physical yesterday. To add to my already known problems, I came to reality that I gained 15 lbs. I was told that I need to stop my erratic smoking and was given a prescription for a physical therapist to assist in my already crippled body. “I thought I was only 30?”
Half a wine bottle, about a pack of cigs and 2 Heinekens last night brought me closer to my misery that all my credit cards are at or over its limit, my mortgage is 2 months behind and I owe my condo over 4 months worth of assessments. I feel worthless because I can’t even be there for my family. Have I failed? Have I turned into that person that lives beyond their means? Or am I just someone that tried to help those around her and put herself last without thinking what the end result was going to be…
I am starring at the pc without a clue what to do next… I want to think so much of a person that will bring a smile to my life but even then I can’t even count on this person to be consistent with me. I want to think so much about the possibility of actually having someone dear to me in my life, but is that what I really want? Can I possible handle a relationship now? Am I just trying to fill a void? I speak these words but in reality I tried but just couldn’t get him on the same speed as myself.
Gypsy, I can feel your pain.
ReplyDeleteIt is very easy to drown your pain in a bucket of pasta.
Better to work out, easier to eat pasta.
Your co-worker has absolutely no idea what you are coping with.
None.
All I can tell you is hang in there and cut it down from 3 plates of pasta to 2.