A Day Late but Not A Dollar Short

I no longer feel stuck. Changing my job role from full time tv news reporter to freelance, was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I no longer have to cope with the frustrations of malfunctioning equipment and a long list of assignments on a daily basis, just on occasion.

Now, I can go in, when I prefer, so I am careful not to burn myself out. Now, I put my other freelance projects first and the tv station comes second. Meaning, don't have to abandon my television news interests, but the higher paying jobs come first.

What I have discovered, is that I really enjoy working in television and I love that I have the skills to shoot, edit and write my own work. I also love being around other folks who love working in tv, but love to complain about it. But I don't complain about it anymore. I am just there at work, trying to put together a story I am proud of. But I also would prefer to work with someone else who does the shooting. Life would be much easier. And believe it or not, the pay would be better.

Ironically, because the tv station, is short staffed, I have been working there every week. When possible, I am even working 40 hours. I know that the tv station is looking for a part time staff member, so my days there, for now are numbered. Because the travel job hasn't started the new projects for 2010 and the promotion job involving my car is pretty much wrapped up, I am working there while hunting for/working on the next big thing.

The promotion involving my car went so well, the company wants to purchase my vehicle. Meaning I will no longer have to pay my car note that I realized just now has exorbitant interest fees. It has to, because I have been paying on the car for 2 years and I somehow still owe close to the ticket price of the vehicle. The car loan is like a payday loan for cripes sakes. Although I love my car like a parent loves her child, I will be glad to get rid of that bill that would never be paid off, ever.

My next move will be to purchase my next car cash, and hopefully that can be done. It seems impossible as I type, but it's a better option than paying a hefty fee every month and the amount you owe doesn't change. I mean that should be illegal.

But since 2007, I have been diligently working to get my credit in order and I am almost there. It is my dream to be credit worthy enough to own a home by the close of this year and I should be there. It is sad to admit, it's not the income from the tv station that is getting me there, but from the vacation sales job, the vacation reporting job and the liquor-car promotion. I am blessed to have come across exciting unconventional jobs that pay great, but until now, I feel like my entire life has been all about a day late and a dollar short. I finally feel like I may be a day late, meaning, nothing extremely monumentous has occured yet (I'm not married, I don't have kids and I don't have a flat screen tv), but I am not a dollar short for a change.

But not only should car notes be illegal, love should be illegal. I feel unstuck at work, but super stuck in the love department. My new beau with the white teeth, with two jobs and college degree aspirations works 15 hours or more a day. But he is so nice. Superbly nice. But I really am looking for the June Carter and Johnny Cash effect. Someone who will walk to another city for me while on drugs and in despair. Someone who I can tell is dying for my company like the Little Couple on TLC, although we are apart. The reality of what I have and what I desire are two completely different things. Can you really only find love on a website or with a reunited high school sweetheart?

I realize I can't find my Johnny Cash while I am not doing a good job of acting like June Carter. Hopefully, it won't take several more years of introspection, because I am tired, very tired of being a day late.